The Triangle Of You
The 3 key points to self mastery are:
your thoughts, your feelings, and your
If you master these three things you
master yourself essentially.
When you master yourself you
create personal power
because all your thinking,
and behaviours are congruent and
aligned along the lines of
the realities your interacting with.
This is when you begin to
master your own destiny.
Your thoughts allow you create
a reality that is useful.
A world for you to live in for a
problem to not exist, to learn
better, to have greater self-esteem,
to be better at sports, to win an election
or whatever your outcome is
intended to be.
From the outcome that you want,
your first step is to think
about a reality that is consistent
with itself. Which is the natural
consequence of the outcome
that you want.
But thinking is not enough.
You need to have power behind it,
it has to be empowered in such a way
so your reality is maintained.
And what empowers your thinking
are your feelings. If you talk in a
certain way and your tonality sub-
communicates of having no faith or belief
in the reality you want, there is
no power in it
to make it real. Even though
it may exist inside your mind,
because of no emotional–
attachment to it, there is no
feeling behind it,
and if there is no feeling there is
no power driving it.
This then comes out in your behaviour
which is the third wing of self-mastery.
Your behavior allows you
to project this internally
empowered sense of reality
you created. Projecting this through
your sub-communications in many different
channels. Such as tonality, language and
All these things will be influenced
by the feelings or state you are in.
This is in turn influenced by
the reality you created and how
it interacts with your feelings to make it
more real for you.
Your thoughts, feelings and
behaviours shape your own reality.
These make up 3 points of a triangle.
Now the beauty of this triangle,
is that each point will affect, reinforce
and change the other points
of the triangle. In other words,
the way that you think about things will
influence the way that you feel
Here’s an example.
Think of a person that you
really dislike and notice
how you feel?
Then clear your mind.
Now think of a person that you
really like and again notice
how you feel?
By doing that,
you had a different emotional experience
based on two different thoughts.
You allowed your thoughts to
dwell on something you like and
something you disliked. That affected
your feelings. Followed by your state
being altered because of it.
you think about a disaster scenario such as
having a conflict with someone. That will
alter your state significantly in a negative
or stress related direction.
Think about people that you love or
pleasant experiences and things you like
doing. You then go into a calmer set of
experiences. So your state gets altered
into a more calmer, tranquil states
Simultaneously, as those
states happen, your behaviour alters.
Typically you think of somebody you don’t
like or a situation that is unpleasant
and you may want to avoid that person
or confront them. Like wise
with the situation.
Of course vice versa.
You think of a person you like,
and you want to approach that
person or situation.
Let’s look at feelings.
Have you ever noticed how difficult
it is to think of cheerful thoughts
when your depressed or remember
Or if you do think about
good times it seems distant
you’ll noticed that your performance
goes down. Have you ever been
depressed whilst playing a sport?
One of two things happen.
Either you lose your depression.
You cheer up basically.
Or you play horribly.
Either your behaviour changes your state,
and therefore your thoughts.
Or your state changes the behaviour
which will change your thinking.
doing something over and over again
becomes a habit.
An easy way to remember this
life formula is the following:
Your thoughts will
change your feelings.
Your feelings will
drive your behaviour.
Your behaviour over time
become habits, and your
habits will determine
what kind of life you end up
you will go from feeling
powerless to being empowered.
P.S. This is just one concept.
My Secrets to a Successful Life Coaching Program is packed with
useful ideas and practical principles
on helping you become the